The first step to save a marriage is for both partners to recognize there are real problems and be prepared to do whatever it takes to overcome the problems. If you deal with your problems in a positively, there should be an excellent chance of avoiding divorce. If you want to find out how to save your marriage, you will need to first talk to your spouse and make sure that they want to work as hard as you do about this. Then, together look for relationship resources that will help you to save the marriage. If you truly love your spouse and the feeling is mutual, there will not be an obstacle big enough to break up your marriage.
If you find you are getting into fights about little things, ask yourselves if this is because you are always looking to find something wrong rather than noticing when the other person does something right and telling them about it. Everyone gets stressed out, but positive change needs to come from somewhere. Even if your spouse doesn’t buy into this initially, try doing this yourself and see how things change on both sides. Find your spouse doing something right and tell them about it, you will be amazed at the changes that will occur in a very short period of time with this approach.
Relationship counseling has worked for many couples. Although seeing a marital counselor cost alot of money, it is generally money well spent. You should be able to determine whether marital counseling will work for you and your relationship within the first few visits and if not, the counselor can offer advice for getting further relationship help.
There are many places you can to to find a relationship counselor, so it’s a good idea to make initial appointments with several choices and ask plenty of questions and find the right therapist for you. Not all therapists are well matched for every client, so keep this in mind and don’t get discouraged if your first few choices aren’t the right ones for you.
The best marriage advice is to regard your marriage as a companionship of two. You will have to give up part of your independence, though definitely not your identity or your true self, and you will have to make sacrifices for your family, and especially for your spouse. It is no more about caring just for yourself, getting some food when you are hungry, going out with friends whenever you feel like it, or working all the time. In a marriage, you will have to give up some of your independence, but in return for great care and love from the side of your spouse, which could be considered as a worthy sacrifice.
Of course some marriages do end in divorce. To a certain extent, you should be able to improve even on a bad marriage, but at some point you might feel that you cannot love and trust your partner anymore. You could perhaps also get marriage advice from a therapist or even a good friend that could help. So, you should definitely hold off getting a divorce until you can get as much marriage advice as possible and do your very best to overcome the obstacles.